Thursday, September 15, 2016

Forget the Smell Test, This Doesn't Pass the Oh, Please, You're Making Me Laugh Out Loud Test

Ah, the Port Angeles (Regional, don't you know) Chamber of Commerce. The dead end, black lagoon(s) of the Port Angeles (Regional) business community. Say, what have you folks been up to lately anyway?

Why, they've been working up a big ol' FIVE YEAR PLAN, that's what. It was mentioned here yesterday, and now has been unleashed for all the community to see. And what a heaping pile of poo it is. It's almost like Mr. Floatie washed up on the Chamber's doorstep and died.

Though there are many laughable things contained within it, let's just focus on the BIG PROMISES to give you the general idea. Read these grandiose notions, ponder them, and then consider how much faith you have in them really occurring.


First, let's note that they make a lot of promises that such and such will happen by 2020 - which is actually only four years (plus change) away. Perhaps this is meant to convey confidence on the Chamber's part. Or perhaps they are just very weak at basic math.

In any case, rest assured that by the year 2020, the Port Angeles (Regional) Chamber of Commerce will have helped to create more than 100 new retail establishments to the "area," as well as more than 1,000 new jobs. They also promise to, and I quote, "create value in the community" by designing and launching a "business leadership development program."

There's EVEN MORE to it, but that ought to do for now. Let's take a moment to ponder those ambitious goals.

Hmmm...

Hmmm...

Now, if there are any doubters out there, let me give you the good word from Luke Robins, Peninsula College president, who said "it is clear the Chamber's plans will be effective." And he's a college man, so it must be true! It is clear that is the case.

Now, for those of you who maybe saying, "Yes, but, we've heard all this before and nothing has ever actually happened and these Chamber goons are a bunch of know-nothing incompetent morons who can never seem to create value or success but sure know how to fall for a good scam," well...I'd say you're being kind of nit-picky.

Comrade Jim Haguewood explains brilliant
Five Year Plan to joyous local proletariats.
***UPDATED!***
Should be "to joyous local polecats."
Apologies for terrible bourgeois mistake!


32 comments:

  1. Jim Haguewood says, "You're gonna win so much, Port Angeles, you're gonna get sick of wining. Believe me!"

    Except we don't, Jim. You're a huckster and a liar, and have zero credibility. We've heard it all before.

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  2. Comrade CK. You are hereby informed by the Central Committee that the correct term is proletarian not proletaraits. Future use of incorrect terms regarding our Glorious Comrade Workers will be viewed as Counter Revolutionary.

    Have a nice day.

    Karlos Marx

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  3. Isn't Haguewood the fellow who ran the Business Incubator Project with former mayor and un-indicted criminal, Karen Rogers. Didn't he start that out with the same promises? Didn't he leave the taxpayers with a huge debt? Didn't he piss away $8 million in do-nothing pie in the sky promises. Yeah, I thought so.

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    Replies
    1. So...You're saying that Jim Haguewood is "experienced" and a "seasoned elder" in the area of economic development? Or at least economic development Clallam County-style?

      Delete
    2. Haguewood's a crook and a con artist, the type that seems drawn here over and over again. Morally bankrupt blood suckers, all of 'em.

      Delete
  4. Where'd you get that awesomely appropriate cartoon? LOL

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  5. 100 NEW retail businesses? Not businesses moving from one location, to another?

    Nippon isn't making paper these days, so the folks that used to run the paper machines aren't making paper. An, the truck drivers that used to deliver chips to the plant to make paper, aren't delivering chips to make paper at Nippon any more. Since the trucks aren't driving as much, they aren't buying as much fuel to deliver the chips that used to make paper. And, since the trucks aren't driving as much, they don't need as much upkeep, so the parts houses and mechanics aren't working as much. And, since all these different workers are not working as much, they're not stopping by the McDonalds or Frugals for that lunch time burger. Etc. Etc.

    Maybe the great minds at the Chamber haven't noticed, but there is a reason the Federal government pumped massive amounts of money via "economic stimulus" into the American economy, and 8 years after the last financial collapse, interest rates are ridiculously low. Why? Because the economy is so healthy?

    Despite the low interest rates, businesses remain cautious. For good reason. They are not going to be running out to Port Angeles, any faster than they have been.

    But, I'll bet the Chamber will be asking for money, to implement all their great promises.

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    Replies
    1. Or as Jim Haguewood might say..."You have to spend money to take money!"

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    2. Or, "you have to spend other people's money in order to make yourself some money."

      Delete
    3. From the one comment on this story on the PDN website...

      "You have got to be kidding me! No one is going to encourage new business in this town or fast track anything. The local business do not want the competition for dollars or labor. No one is going to fast track anything."

      That's the truth, and all anyone needs to know. No one is going to fast track anything.

      Delete
  6. Radmilla, Worker For The PeopleSeptember 15, 2016 at 11:34 AM

    Comrade Editor,

    Even I, Radmilla, Worker For the People, know that "proletariat" is the correct plural. "Proletariats" is simply a word you made up in your ignorance.

    I urge you, Comrade Editor, to engage with the proletariat and do some real work, not hobnobbing with elitists and trying to get your picture in The Daily Worker.

    love and kisses,

    Radmilla, Worker For the People

    ReplyDelete
  7. As of a minute ago, there was a grand total of zero comments on this story on the PDN's site. The chamber knows their stupid "plan" will do nothing. The people also know it will do nothing, and are responding (not!) accordingly.

    What is the audience for this waste of time from the chamber? Do they really think they're fooling anyone? Inspiring anyone?

    What a waste of time they are.

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    Replies
    1. This is exactly what grant whores do. Exactly.

      This is not a waste of time, from their perspective. This is exactly how they justify their jobs, their income, and their existence.

      Delete
    2. Exactly. Wrap your heads around the mentality of the hardened white collar grant whore. To them it is SO EASY to grovel for a grant of some kind, skim what you will, and crawl back under your rock until the next deal that your cronies dream up comes down the pipe. The words they throw about mean absolutely nothing, except to appear on the grant application form. But if it hits payola, the pigs are back at the trough. The rest of you, well, you can go back to pounding sand and trying to make a living the old fashioned way.

      Who says there isn't any vision of opportunity around here? Welfare for the grant whores! Empty words for you! And more corruption at city hall to get their piece of the pie.

      Beg. Skim. Repeat.

      Out here we have us a welfare economy, and the insiders can put their tiny heads together for no other purpose. That's why your problems go unaddressed. What's wrong with this picture?

      Delete
    3. Beg. Skim, Repeat.

      Yep. Good summation.

      Delete
    4. Ah, yes, but Anon 9:58 PM left a step out of their comments. Beg. Skim. FAIL. Repeat.

      For, without failure, there is no need or opportunity to go back to begging. In other words, this approach, this plan, is completely predicated on it failing. It needs to fail to succeed.

      Think about what this means. The grant whores here (and there are many of them) have a vested interest in things failing in Port Angeles and Clallam County. If a venture is an actual, honest to god success, well, how will that put any money into the pockets of Grant Munro, Karen Rogers, Jim Haguewood, or any number of others? The answer is, of course, it won't.

      So these creatures need ventures that are certain to bring in (tax) dollars that they can bleed and control to a certain extent, and that are ultimately doomed. That is the only way this vampiric cycle can be repeated.

      They have no desire to add businesses, grow businesses, or create real competition for themselves or their cronies. None whatsoever. These "leaders" in "economic development" will lead us nowhere except deeper and deeper into a rathole of debt and failure. Because, ironically but functionally (for them), that's what "success" looks like.

      We are trapped in a sick, bizarre world here, and I for one don't know how we're ever going to change this dynamic, short of a wholesale banishing of these leeches. Until that happens, this town will continue to die, and they will continue to feast on its corpse.

      Delete
  8. It's good to be ambitious.

    It's bad to lie.

    This plan is a lie, like so many before it. Those behind it have neither the intention or the skill to carry it out.

    It is more smoke and mirrors BS.

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  9. This is a rehash of Port Angeles United. Instead of being able to feed off the downtown association and the business association the chamber has to do this on their own. Let's just see if they can pull off any of this without scamming for tax money. Since they have been removed from the city's tit they haven't had much of a presence in town.

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  10. The one part of the story that jumped out to me as one of their goals was for a PAID full time director........hmmmm Jimmy my boy, who ya got in mind?

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    Replies
    1. I'm sure if duty called, Mr. Hogwood would answer.

      Delete
  11. Hot Dam, the chamber is going to create a zillion jobs and so is the EDC, man this is gonna be fat city in just 3 years.
    Buy up all the property you can so you can rent it out to all those people coming over from Seattle when we pull all their jobs outa there.

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  12. "The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to such a pass that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others."
    Fyodor Dostoyevsky

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    Replies
    1. Wonder how ole Fyodor knew Donald Trump...

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  13. Gabe Rygaard is dead. A big ol' car wreck accident. Will await further details, which should be interesting...

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    Replies
    1. Following too close. And not wearing a seatbelt. And there you have it. No one will want to say it, but it was nobody's fault but his own.

      Delete
    2. Yep. I just read the latest version of the article, and you seem pretty spot on. The facts are what they are.

      But still, be prepared to be called "insensitive" or "callous."

      Delete
    3. Of interest: was he on the phone?

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    4. Did anyone else see Jim McEntire's gushy, over the top tribute to Rygaard? Something about how "the whole country is a little poorer now." Really pouring it on.

      Even though he's not in office anymore, I guess McEntire's still in the hot air business.

      Delete
    5. I saw that even Ron Richards felt the need to gush it up, too.

      Sorry, but, I just don't see the need.

      Delete
  14. This morning, as I was making coffee, I realized that I'm so disgusted with what the PDN has become, I don't check their website anymore, to find out what is going on in my community!

    Yes, I stopped subscribing years ago. That was out of disappointment in the coverage of events I had attended, and had personal, first hand knowledge of what really happened. That the Peninsula Daily News could twist events to suit it's political agenda was something I could no longer support, ethically.

    But, as a long time news junkie, and as someone concerned about my community, I did still start off my day glancing through the website. I feel it is my obligation to try to be informed, and do what I can to help.

    The events earlier this year showed the Peninsula Daily News would openly and overtly write lies. Their reporters ere present during Cherie Kidd's meltdown, but they participated in, and continue to participate in covering up what happened.

    A community cannot move forward and correct problems if the community news paper engages in covering up the wrongdoings of it's leadership. The vast majority of the voting public in Clallam County do not attend City Council, County Commissioners, Chamber of Commerce, EDC or any of the other meetings of what constitutes local leadership. They rely on the community news paper to keep them informed of issues, and to inform them when there are issues of concern.

    There is a trust granted by the public to community newspapers.

    But the Peninsula Daily News has lost sight of it's proper role, and allowed itself to abuse the public's trust for the personal benefit of a few.

    That someone like me will not even glance through their website to see what is going on in my community reveals the extent to which they have lost trust and credibility.

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  15. So the CoC plans to raise retail sales from $327M in 2013 to $390M in 2020? Inflation of 2.6% would do that much, without anyone lifting a finger. That's not growth. If they can grow the full time workforce by a thousand that would mean something. We'll see. More likely we'll see how many of these leaders jump ship in 2018 and 2019, and leave someone else holding the bag for their glorious promises.

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    Replies
    1. Anyone know the sources of their funding?

      What grant are they after? More from the state?

      Delete